< Earlier Kibitzing · PAGE 288 OF 288 ·
|Mar-19-17|| ||thegoodanarchist: < technical draw: I wanted to start a singing career so I went to an agent. He said I should sing solo. So low nobody can hear me.>|
That's an oldy but a goody.
< Another agent said I should sing tenor. Ten or twenty miles away from him.>
I had never heard this one before! I got a good laugh from it - thanks.
|Mar-19-17|| ||thegoodanarchist: <"ha, and you thought I was just making things up!">|
What about "Ha! They laughed and said I was a hypochondriac! Who's laughing NOW?"
|Mar-19-17|| ||technical draw: Good one <tga>.|
|Mar-24-17|| ||technical draw: One of my favorite songs of all time:
|Mar-24-17|| ||technical draw: And this one: (Uh, oh, TD is stuck on memory lane!):|
|Mar-24-17|| ||saffuna: I'm on the same lane! Nice song.|
|Mar-25-17|| ||technical draw: The story of a beautiful girl, a beautiful voice, and a tragic disease, Karen Carpenter:|
|Mar-26-17|| ||technical draw: This is a better documentary about Karen Carpenter:|
|Mar-26-17|| ||technical draw: I bet you didn't know about this:
|Mar-26-17|| ||technical draw: One of the biggest pieces of psychological horse manure I have ever encountered is the Minnesota Multiphasic Personality Inventory test. Why it's still around I don't know. I won't explain it but if you want to know more have at it:|
|Mar-27-17|| ||technical draw: In my study of human stampedes I have learned that the movement of people takes on a wave appearance. You can see that in a single file, long queue. When the person in front abandons the line a space appears. This space is then occupied by the second in line. This space then appears to be moving in opposite direction to the flow of people.|
(Posted for TD's reference only).
|Mar-27-17|| ||technical draw: Escaping a crush:
After you're pushed forward, like in a wave there's a lull. In that lull is your chance to move, and the way you move is on a diagonal, between pockets of people. There's always space between people. A couple of steps sideways, another wave surge, then another couple of steps in the next lull. You work your way out that way till you get to the periphery.
But: After a point you can't get out, it doesn't matter how big you are, how strong you are. After a certain point you're trapped.
|Mar-30-17|| ||technical draw: Darn I'm playing the white side of a Sicilian and somehow I always play 9. 0-0-0. Thing is I hate that move but always wind up playing it. Darn opening explorer!|
|Mar-31-17|| ||falso contacto: We use to listen to the Carpenters arriving to Bariloche from Buenos Aires after a 24+ hours drive. Then my uncle the priest would sing Zamba de mi esperanza or Estas son las maņanitas.|
|Apr-12-17|| ||falso contacto: Che que tengas buen Pesaj. Dios te bendiga.|
|Apr-13-17|| ||technical draw: Gracias <falso contacto>>.|
|Apr-14-17|| ||technical draw: אֵל מָלֵא רַחֲמִים
הַמְצֵא מְנוּחָה נְכוֹנָה
עַל כַּנְפֵי הַשְּׁכִינָה
בְּמַעֲלוֹת קְדוֹשִׁים וטְהוֹרִים
כְּזוֹהַר הָרָקִיעַ מַזְהִירִים
(אֶת נִשְׁמַת (ל ואני
בַּעֲבוּר שֶׁנָדְבוּ צְדָקָה
בְּעַד הַזְכָּרַת נִשְׁמָתה
.בְּגַן עֵדֶן תְּהֵא מְנוּחָתה
לָכֵן בַּעַל הָרַחֲמִים
,יַסְתִּירֵהָ בְּסֵתֶר כְּנָפָיו לְעוֹלָמִים
,וְיִצְרֹר בִּצְרוֹר הַחַיִּים אֶת נִשְׁמָתה
ה' הוּא נַחֲלָתה, וְתנוּחַ
,בְּשָׁלוֹם עַל מִשְׁכָּבהּ
|Apr-14-17|| ||technical draw: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=neD...|
|Apr-14-17|| ||technical draw: No doubt about it. Mozart was a jazz man. In the Requiem above you can hear the blues horn in the Tuba Mirum. Also a lot of his piano sonatas have jazz scales. So I proclaim Mozart the first Jazz composer!|
|Apr-16-17|| ||technical draw: Last Saturday was my mother's birthday. We had a great family reunion wth cousins, nieces, and nephews coming in from different states.|
Of course I couldn't let this crowd go away without doing my stand-up. The first one was great, a routine I call left-right similar to Abbott and Costello's Who's on first. It was really great and I got a huge applause.
Of course I couldn't let good enough alone so I did a second routine with a tepid response. That didn't stop me though because i did a third routine and really bombed!
Which proves the saying "always leave them wanting for more". The only thing I got out of it was a horrendous sore throat that now I have to go to the doctor tomorrow. Who said comedy was funny?
|Apr-16-17|| ||TheFocus: <TD> I can see your problem right away.|
You should have reversed the order. Next time, instead of 1-2-3, try 3-2-1. Then they would have forgotten the crummy first set and you would have been heralded as a comedic hero.
This review was not free. I expect payment of $20, preferably in small bills. Please leave them in a paper sack on a bench at the bus station.
|Apr-17-17|| ||technical draw: Well I just got back from the Doc. One thing I learned is when you think you have a cold or the flu forget all the OTC medicines. They're a big rip off. Head for the doctor and get some real medicine; antivirals or anti-bacterials. Treat the cause and not the symptoms.|
<TheFocus> . Thanks for that advice but I'm getting rid of routines 2 and 3. 1 is a winner and I have another one in production to replace the losers. I left your $20 at the bus station but a bum picked it up 2 seconds after I dropped it off. Man those guys are fast!
|Apr-17-17|| ||TheFocus: That bums me out. I was counting on that money.|
Uh... can I borrow $20.
|Apr-17-17|| ||technical draw: <TheFocus> <Uh... can I borrow $20.>|
No. But if you write a good joke I might pay $20 for it. (emphasis on might).
|Apr-17-17|| ||TheFocus: <technical draw: <TheFocus> <Uh... can I borrow $20.>|
<No. But if you write a good joke I might pay $20 for it. (emphasis on might).>
I'm no <WannaBe>.
Nor am I a wallaby.
< Earlier Kibitzing · PAGE 288 OF 288 ·