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Phony Benoni
Member since Feb-10-06 · Last seen Jul-28-14
Greetings, O Seeker After Knowledge! You have arrived in Detroit, Michigan (whether you like it or not), and are reading words of wisdom from a player rated 2950--plus or minus 1000 points.

However, I've more or less retired from serious play--not that I ever took chess really seriously. You only have to look at my games to see that. These days I pursue the simple pleasures of finding games that are bizarre or just plain funny. I'd rather enjoy a game than analyze it.

For the record, my name is David Moody. This probably means nothing to you unless you're a longtime player from Michigan, though it's possible that if you attended any U.S. Opens from 1975-1999 we might have crossed paths. Lucky you.

If you know me at all, you'll realize that most of my remarks are meant to be humorous. I do this deliberately, so that if my analysis stinks to high heaven I can always say that I was just joking.

As you can undoubtedly tell from my sparkling wit, I'm a librarian in my spare time. Even worse, I'm a cataloger, which means I keep log books for cattle. Also, I'm not one of those extroverts who sit at the Reference Desk and help you with research. Instead, I spend all day staring at a computer screen updating and maintaining information in the library's catalog. The general public thinks Reference Librarians are dull. Reference Librarians think Catalogers are dull.

My greatest achievement in chess, other than tricking you into reading this, was probably mating with king, bishop and knight against king in a tournament game. I have to admit that this happened after an adjournment, and that I booked up like crazy before resuming. By the way, the fact I have had adjourned games shows you I've been around too long.

My funniest moment occurred when I finally got a chance to pull off a smothered mate in actual play. You know, 1.Nf7+ Kg8 2.Nh6+ Kh8 3.Qg8+ Rxg8 4.Nf7#. When I played the climactic queen check my opponent looked at the board in shocked disbelief and said, "But that's not mate! I can take the queen!"

Finally, I must confess that I once played a positional move, back around 1982. I'll try not to let that happen again.

>> Click here to see Phony Benoni's game collections.

Chessgames.com Full Member

   Phony Benoni has kibitzed 14223 times to chessgames   [more...]
   Jul-28-14 M Gerusel vs D Werner, 1984 (replies)
 
Phony Benoni: <lost in space> 25.Rd8 Qxf6 does not work for White, Monday or no Monday.
 
   Jul-27-14 Boleslavsky vs Polyak, 1940
 
Phony Benoni: One of the advantages a bishop has over a knight in the endgame is its ability to gain a move. It's not often he gets to flaunt this skill in the middle game, but watch this. After <25...Ne6>: [DIAGRAM] The bishop hits the rook with <26.Ba4>. After <26...Red8 ...
 
   Jul-27-14 Phony Benoni chessforum (replies)
 
Phony Benoni: The old 4-3-2 double play. http://m.mlb.com/video/v34830517/bo... I know you can get a big lead off second when the shift is on, but that was certainly pushing his luck.
 
   Jul-25-14 A Hodges vs A E Blackmar, 1892 (replies)
 
Phony Benoni: Point of information: Black was not the gambit guy. That was Armand Edward Blackmar , a New Orleans music publisher who died in 1888. This A. E. Blackmar was a New York lawyer and jurist. No relation, as far as I know.
 
   Jul-24-14 H Richards vs S Williams, 2003 (replies)
 
Phony Benoni: Looking for checks. 23.Qd6+ would be nice if the rook didn't cover. <23.Bc8+> deflects the rook. Let's check that out: <23...Kf6> (some defelection; 23...Rxc8 24.Qd6#) <24.Qxd4+ Kg6 25.Bf5+ Kh6 26.Bxg5+ Kxg5 27.Qxg7+ Kf4> Well, we gained a piece. Can we get ...
 
   Jul-23-14 N Whitaker vs J Winter, 1918 (replies)
 
Phony Benoni: There is a group picture in the ACB in which Jackson Whipps Showalter is standing behind Whitaker and giving him a glare of extreme mistrust, while no doubt clutching his wallet.
 
   Jul-23-14 J D Tisdall vs Judit Polgar, 1988 (replies)
 
Phony Benoni: Same old stuff. Pry open the h-file and force mate.
 
   Jul-22-14 Reuben Fine
 
Phony Benoni: <perfidious> Yes, John Speights. That was the guy. At least I was half right. Better than usual.
 
   Jul-22-14 Fine vs B Dahlstrom, 1935
 
Phony Benoni: <crawfb5> Thanks. I must have goofed transcribing the game.
 
   Jul-21-14 J Banas vs A Ornstein, 1974 (replies)
 
Phony Benoni: Bishop controls g8, piece ready to sac on h7--automatic. Not Anastasia, but certainly a first cousin.
 
(replies) indicates a reply to the comment.

Let's play two!

Kibitzer's Corner
< Earlier Kibitzing  · PAGE 282 OF 605 ·  Later Kibitzing>
Sep-29-11
Premium Chessgames Member
  Jim Bartle: Yes, well there was that. The players they buy do have to play, though. Josh Beckett, for example. Your very expensive ace just can't give up six runs in the second-to-last game of the season.
Sep-29-11
Premium Chessgames Member
  WannaBe: Lackey, after leaving the Angels was never 'quite the same'. Money made him complacent?
Sep-29-11
Premium Chessgames Member
  WannaBe: 1 in 278 <MILLION>! http://sports.yahoo.com/mlb/blog/bi...
Sep-29-11
Premium Chessgames Member
  WannaBe: 'Really' tough trivia question here...

In 2011, BoSox have a record 77-1 if they have the lead after 8 full innings.

Which game did they not win after having the lead after 8 full innings?

Sep-29-11
Premium Chessgames Member
  technical draw: <Which game did they not win after having the lead after 8 full innings??

Um, their last game?

Sep-29-11
Premium Chessgames Member
  WannaBe: Congratulations to <technical draw>, you have won a year's supply of Rice-o-Roni!! (Two boxes worth, that is a year's supply for a rabbit. =)
Sep-29-11
Premium Chessgames Member
  technical draw: And I WILL claim my two boxes....
Sep-29-11
Premium Chessgames Member
  WannaBe: <technical draw> Please submit form 1040TD to:

1 Wabbit Hole, Warner Brothers Studio, Hollywood, CA 91522

To expidite your award, please also enclose a check for $20.00 for S & H.

Sep-29-11
Premium Chessgames Member
  technical draw: Thanks, I will submit everything today. And while I'm at the post office I'll send the $1,000 to claim my Nigerian gold. Lucky me!
Sep-29-11
Premium Chessgames Member
  Phony Benoni: The question of wealthy teams stockpiling the most highly rated players is hardly something limited to sports. Indeed, is it not part of the American Dream to gain experience and knowledge in order to move on to more lucrative positions? It's brought into a higher profile in sports by the sheer size of the salary, but is really no different from Big City Law Firm hiring the young hotshot from Mom & Pop's Family Law Firm and General Store.

In the end, it's not the best players but who play the best. And I sometimes wonder if baseball executives get the most pleasure out of simply collecting their specimens and outdoing their rivals.

"Here's a exquisite piece I picked up from Oakland. A five-tool switch-hitting centerfielder, not yet 30 years old!"

"Marvelous! It makes me wish I had spent my money more wisely than just winning the World Series."

"You must get your priorites straight; whoever dies with the most free agents wins. But there's even more! Look at this marvelous stripe down the back!"

"Exquisite!"

"What's more, it changes color to yellow whenever Fall comes! Why, with a team full of players like this, who knows what we can accomplish!"

Sep-29-11
Premium Chessgames Member
  Jim Bartle: Talking about Carl Crawford again?
Sep-29-11
Premium Chessgames Member
  Phony Benoni: I expect him to be making a Miller Lite commercial with Bill Buckner any day now.

All the buzz around Detroit last winter was getting either Adam Dunn or Carl Crawford in the Free Agent Garage Sale. Instead, the Tigers disappointed all their fans by taking the relatively unheralded Victor Martinez.

Oh, did they ever do the right thing! Martinez hit .330 with 103 RBIs, and help set up Miguel Cabrera's big season by hitting behind him.

We haven't talked much about Adam Dunn around here, but his season was historically bad. I mean all-time historically bad. In 122 games as the White Sox DH, he had 11 HR, 42 RBIs, 177 strikeouts, and a batting average of .159.

Sep-29-11
Premium Chessgames Member
  Shams: <In 122 games as the White Sox DH, he had 11 HR, 42 RBIs, 177 strikeouts, and a batting average of .159.>

With numbers like that, I'm sure our beloved GM Jack Z will be working the phones all offseason to swing a deal for him. The man was clearly born to be a Mariner.

Sep-29-11
Premium Chessgames Member
  OhioChessFan: <PB: It's brought into a higher profile in sports by the sheer size of the salary, but is really no different from Big City Law Firm hiring the young hotshot from Mom & Pop's Family Law Firm and General Store.>

Again, the sports teams <need> their competitors, whereas Big City wouldn't mind eliminating their competitors.

Sep-29-11
Premium Chessgames Member
  OhioChessFan: The White Sox sat Dunn the last 2 games to avoid him getting enough plate appearances to qualify for season records.
Sep-29-11
Premium Chessgames Member
  Shams: <OCF> Well that was kind of them. But don't we put asterisks in record books now? Whoever holds the current record might have a slight grievance if Adam Dunn's standout performance is lost to history.
Sep-29-11
Premium Chessgames Member
  Jim Bartle: PB: Was there no chance for the Tigers to hold onto Granderson? He had a heck of a season with NY.
Sep-30-11
Premium Chessgames Member
  Phony Benoni: <JB> It wasn't really a matter of not being able to hold on to Granderson, but simply some horse trading.

The Tigers gave up Granderson and an fairly good starting pitcher in Edwin Jackson. In return, they got (a) Austin Jackson, basically Granderson without power and possibly even better in the field; (b) Max Sherzer, a solid #3 starter who won 15 games this year; (c) Phil Coke, a strong set-up man in the bullpen; (d) Daniel Schlereth, a useful left-handed option in the bullpen. In short, they gave up some offense (of which they had plenty) to shore up the pitching staff.

Not everybody was happy with giving up Granderson, but his game is built for Yankee Stadium; there's no way he would hit 40 home runs in Detroit. He remains popular here; when the Yankees come in for game three, there won't be much booing for him.

Sep-30-11
Premium Chessgames Member
  WannaBe: Now that Ozzie is in Florida, this commercial will be 'fitting' http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ki6R...

E. Jackson, when he was w/ the Dodgers, he was a flash in the pan...

So he pitched a 60-walk no hitter. How many pitchers have had a no hitter/perfect game and is not in the Hall. Or never ever mentioned again.

Besides what's-his-name that pitched back-to-back no-hitters that everyone talks about?

Sep-30-11
Premium Chessgames Member
  Jim Bartle: My mistake with Granderson. I'd thought he'd just signed as a free agent with the Yankees. And I see that though he had a great year in 2011, he wasn't so great for NY in 2010.
Sep-30-11
Premium Chessgames Member
  keypusher: I've kept track of Dunn with a sort of horrified fascination this year. The link below does a good job of putting his season in perspective. He made Rob Deer look like Ty Cobb...or at least 2011-edition Derek Jeter.

http://mlb.sbnation.com/2011/9/29/2...

<Dunn's season was worse offensively than pretty much anyone from the Year of the Pitcher, 1968, and he broke other records that had stood for seven decades....Dunn also was 6-for-94 -- .064 -- against LHP this year with 39 strikeouts. Probably half the right-handed-hitting pitchers on the White Sox could have done better than that.>

<PB> Nice to hear about Granderson. Seems like a very good guy.

Sep-30-11
Premium Chessgames Member
  Phony Benoni: <JB> Looking at Granderson's career, his 2011 numbers aren't that shocking. He once hit 30 HRs for the Tigers at Comerica Park, which is probably equivalent to a left-hander hitting 40 at Yankee Stadium.

His career year before 2011 was 2007, with a .302 average, 38 doubles, 23 triples, 23 home runs, 26 steals. His average in particular tailed off after that.

Also, in Detroit he was always the lead-off man, more or less by default, and was not able to realize his RBI and power potential. The Yankees gave him a chance to do that this year.

Austin Jackson is still just a second-year player, with all the tools and plenty of time to develop. But even so, it was a good trade for all three teams involved; Arizona got a pitcher named Kennedy from the Yankees who is an NL Cy Young candidate this year.

Sep-30-11
Premium Chessgames Member
  technical draw: Wow, I didn't realize it was THIS close:

<The Red Sox were one strike away from winning and the Rays were one strike away from losing..>

Sep-30-11
Premium Chessgames Member
  Jim Bartle: <The Red Sox were one strike away from winning and the Rays were one strike away from losing..>

As the philosopher Yogi once said...

Sep-30-11
Premium Chessgames Member
  Phony Benoni: "It ain't over until the fat lady leaves the building on Elvis' arm."
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