Would you like a drink while you're waiting? Petrosian vs Spassky, 1966  (A00) Uncommon Opening, 39 moves, 1/2-1/2 The one with his head in a blanket Karpov vs Kasparov, 1984  (D37) Queen's Gambit Declined, 59 moves, 1-0 The milkmaid in Immediate danger of chocolate Capablanca vs Alekhine, 1924  (C12) French, McCutcheon, 62 moves, 1/2-1/2 Back end of a pantomime pigeon Portisch vs Kavalek, 1975  (E80) King's Indian, Samisch Variation, 38 moves, 1/2-1/2 I claim this Union Jack for England! Chigorin vs Steinitz, 1889  (C52) Evans Gambit, 70 moves, 1/2-1/2 Nobody leaves the bunker! Spassky vs Polugaevsky, 1960  (B96) Sicilian, Najdorf, 24 moves, 1/2-1/2 First blast of the Clarion Polugaevsky vs Korchnoi, 1980  (A34) English, Symmetrical, 41 moves, 0-1 Ein kilo von icing sugar E Dizdarevic vs Miles, 1985  (E14) Queen's Indian, 18 moves, 0-1 Nuts, candy-peel, cherries, icing, swastika.... T H Tylor vs Flohr, 1936  (C19) French, Winawer, Advance, 96 moves, 1-0 The Glimmering West Unzicker vs Larsen, 1966  (B61) Sicilian, Richter-Rauzer, Larsen Variation, 7.Qd2, 38 moves, 1/2-1/2 Climbing Mount Everest from the inside Szabo vs Fischer, 1970  (A36) English, 37 moves, 0-1 Let's carry on with the wedding G Botterill vs Tal, 1973  (B43) Sicilian, Kan, 5.Nc3, 51 moves, 0-1 Carefree toss of the head Van der Wiel vs Karpov, 1987  (B17) Caro-Kann, Steinitz Variation, 30 moves, 1/2-1/2 I will shout at you later, Martin Teichmann vs Marshall, 1911  (C42) Petrov Defense, 76 moves, 0-1 A wonderful ventriloquist act Lasker vs Steinitz, 1894  (C62) Ruy Lopez, Old Steinitz Defense, 46 moves, 1-0 South of the border, down Mexico way Deep Fritz vs Deep Junior, 2001  (B67) Sicilian, Richter-Rauzer Attack, 7...a6 Defense, 8...Bd7, 69 moves, 0-1 Breaking wind in a lift Karpov vs Kasparov, 1986  (D31) Queen's Gambit Declined, 43 moves, 1/2-1/2 He likes sitting down on the job Geller vs Fischer, 1970  (D79) Neo-Grunfeld, 6.O-O, Main line, 72 moves, 0-1 Over the pink whale R Franz vs Mayet, 1858  (C42) Petrov Defense, 69 moves, 0-1 He's capsized! Szabo vs Bronstein, 1950  (A90) Dutch, 71 moves, 1/2-1/2 Dmitri's Office Lipschutz vs E Delmar, 1889  (B12) Caro-Kann Defense, 51 moves, 1-0 If you have two queens, you can't win Belov vs V Prohorov, 1991  (E97) King's Indian, 82 moves, 0-1 The leather tuba Z Mackic vs A Maksimenko, 1994  (B96) Sicilian, Najdorf, 51 moves, 0-1 There's still ten minutes before the dynamite - Kasparov vs Karpov, 1984  (E15) Queen's Indian, 37 moves, 1/2-1/2 The year is 1600. A sentry walks the battlements S Atalik vs Miles, 1993  (E81) King's Indian, Samisch, 30 moves, 0-1 Hold this treasure chest Kasparov vs I A Zaitsev, 1980  (D58) Queen's Gambit Declined, Tartakower (Makagonov-Bondarevsky) Syst, 30 moves, 1-0 Let's see them do that on television Korchnoi vs Kasparov, 1982  (A64) Benoni, Fianchetto, 11...Re8, 36 moves, 0-1 Parked in a layby of introspection R Nezhmetdinov vs M Ujtelky, 1964  (A00) Uncommon Opening, 75 moves, 0-1 The Internal Mountain Smyslov vs Ribli, 1983  (D42) Queen's Gambit Declined, Semi-Tarrasch, 7.Bd3, 42 moves, 1-0 Busy clockwise, tram suspended Korchnoi vs Karpov, 1981  (D58) Queen's Gambit Declined, Tartakower (Makagonov-Bondarevsky) Syst, 43 moves, 0-1 Clobber the knees Fischer vs J Sherwin, 1957  (B90) Sicilian, Najdorf, 36 moves, 1-0 An overflowing tent Gligoric vs E E Book, 1948  (D49) Queen's Gambit Declined Semi-Slav, Meran, 51 moves, 1-0 Legs caught in backstage equipment Winawer vs Englisch, 1883  (C69) Ruy Lopez, Exchange, Gligoric Variation, 59 moves, 1-0 Test object for life-waves Spielmann vs Rubinstein, 1928  (C86) Ruy Lopez, Worrall Attack, 31 moves, 1-0 A meeting of the ministry of works Lipschutz vs Lasker, 1902  (C29) Vienna Gambit, 89 moves, 1/2-1/2 We are from earth - friends! Bronstein vs K Darga, 1964  (D31) Queen's Gambit Declined, 45 moves, 1-0 I must read Hansard tomorrow Chigorin vs Tarrasch, 1905  (C00) French Defense, 52 moves, 0-1 A civic reception in a police state Petrosian vs Karpov, 1979  (E19) Queen's Indian, Old Main line, 9.Qxc3, 15 moves, 1/2-1/2 Prisoners! Follow me! Anderssen vs Steinitz, 1873  (C77) Ruy Lopez, 45 moves, 0-1 We seized this ice-cube in battle M Jago vs J E Littlewood, 1964  (C33) King's Gambit Accepted, 43 moves, 0-1 Excavations in the Tower of London A A R Afifi vs Beliavsky, 1985  (A13) English, 23 moves, 0-1 It's really Petunia Winegum F Braga vs Timman, 1982  (B12) Caro-Kann Defense, 31 moves, 1/2-1/2 I have suffered since you blasted my kingdom Botvinnik vs Tal, 1961  (E80) King's Indian, Samisch Variation, 83 moves, 0-1 Finding the wrong right-place M Stolberg vs Botvinnik, 1940  (E48) Nimzo-Indian, 4.e3 O-O 5.Bd3 d5, 41 moves, 0-1 Each shovel-full will be posted to you T Chapman vs Kasparov, 2001  (000) Chess variants, 37 moves, 1-0 Tomorrow we sail for India Karpov vs Kasparov, 1990  (E92) King's Indian, 44 moves, 1-0 The Saskatchewan Red Indian Cavalry Spassky vs Leon Weiss, 1966  (B01) Scandinavian, 20 moves, 1-0 I didn't want a Ruy Lopez! J N Berger vs Nimzowitsch, 1907  (A46) Queen's Pawn Game, 44 moves, 1/2-1/2 Come along, Fellini! Remember me? H Lopez Silva vs M Barbosa, 2005 (B14) Caro-Kann, Panov-Botvinnik Attack, 77 moves, 1-0 Wild blue yonder Shabalov vs Bologan, 2005  (C67) Ruy Lopez, 76 moves, 0-1 Heavily disguised and holding giraffe B Belopolsky vs B M Kogan, 1984  (B30) Sicilian, 57 moves, 1-0 An effort to save our planet Earth A Baburin vs Adianto, 1993  (D25) Queen's Gambit Accepted, 24 moves, 0-1 Hurling your bodies into the void Alekhine vs Capablanca, 1927  (D67) Queen's Gambit Declined, Orthodox Defense, Bd3 line, 43 moves, 1/2-1/2 A long thin green thing M Gesthuysen vs A O'Brien, 1986  (E66) King's Indian, Fianchetto, Yugoslav Panno, 50 moves, 0-1 That's right... One HELL of a beating!! Anand vs Kasparov, 1995  (B77) Sicilian, Dragon, Yugoslav Attack, 25 moves, 0-1 Are your men on the right pills? Paulsen vs Winawer, 1882  (C45) Scotch Game, 64 moves, 1-0 Possibly a missed brilliancy Kasparov vs Anand, 1999  (D20) Queen's Gambit Accepted, 29 moves, 1/2-1/2 We both need a shave... Janowski vs Lasker, 1910  (D04) Queen's Pawn Game, 87 moves, 0-1 We order him disposed of tonight by public execution J van Ruitenburg vs S Castellani, 2000  (A45) Queen's Pawn Game, 27 moves, 1-0 An ex-poacher catches the bus I Sokolov vs Anand, 2006  (D26) Queen's Gambit Accepted, 15 moves, 1/2-1/2 Island Brewery Kasparov vs Korchnoi, 1986  (E11) Bogo-Indian Defense, 42 moves, 1/2-1/2 10,000 working like blazes J Sunye Neto vs Kasparov, 1981  (D32) Queen's Gambit Declined, Tarrasch, 47 moves, 0-1 Rabbits, ferrets, lurchers, men with nets and guns M Zialor vs H Ho, 2006  (B90) Sicilian, Najdorf, 43 moves, 0-1 This is a public announcement... Execution is at 21:25 Miles vs P Littlewood, 1984  (A28) English, 45 moves, 0-1 Gas works more quickly on an Alfie E Diemer vs F Trommsdorf, 1973  (B07) Pirc, 47 moves, 1/2-1/2 "I beat Karpov!" - Karner H Karner vs Karpov, 1972  (A46) Queen's Pawn Game, 43 moves, 1-0 We'll wake up in a minute and laugh at all this Karjakin vs Anand, 2006  (B90) Sicilian, Najdorf, 37 moves, 0-1 Sorry, ladies. Marshall vs N Whitaker, 1909  (C38) King's Gambit Accepted, 42 moves, 1/2-1/2 Back from the dead - saved with a kiss Tal vs Koblents, 1957  (B63) Sicilian, Richter-Rauzer Attack, 37 moves, 1-0 Conditioning him to Earth's climate Morozevich vs Vachier-Lagrave, 2009  (B80) Sicilian, Scheveningen, 76 moves, 0-1 In the middle of a field playing the drums S Webb vs Reshevsky, 1973  (E69) King's Indian, Fianchetto, Classical Main line, 77 moves, 1-0 For the glory of the great God, Dizan Spassky vs Korchnoi, 1977  (C19) French, Winawer, Advance, 65 moves, 0-1 Incarcerated in a gentleman's rest home Averbakh vs Spassky, 1956  (E75) King's Indian, Averbakh, Main line, 73 moves, 1/2-1/2 Mastering the monsoon Shirov vs D Reinderman, 1999  (B46) Sicilian, Taimanov Variation, 44 moves, 1-0 Q-sac on move 8 D Andreikin vs Karjakin, 2010  (A27) English, Three Knights System, 10 moves, 1-0 Are you filing your teeth? Svidler vs Aronian, 2010  (C63) Ruy Lopez, Schliemann Defense, 27 moves, 1-0 The contract on the boiled egg Karpov vs Anand, 1991  (D45) Queen's Gambit Declined Semi-Slav, 70 moves, 0-1 We are emptying your pockets. Tukmakov vs Korchnoi, 1970  (E55) Nimzo-Indian, 4.e3, Gligoric System, Bronstein Variation, 41 moves, 1-0 The Great Sebastian Arrives I A Zaitsev vs O Dementiev, 1970  (B90) Sicilian, Najdorf, 20 moves, 1-0 The plasticine nose Kamsky vs Svidler, 2011  (C78) Ruy Lopez, 28 moves, 0-1 Nothing above level three Alekhine vs Gruenfeld, 1922  (D80) Grunfeld, 55 moves, 0-1 James Gibbs spunky mudflaps M Weiss vs J Schwarz, 1883  (C01) French, Exchange, 27 moves, 1/2-1/2 Of course I'm all right you cretin. Kotronias vs Bologan, 2007  (C92) Ruy Lopez, Closed, 55 moves, 0-1 A rundown of all potential victims... ParSOS vs ETABETA, 2006  (E12) Queen's Indian, 23 moves, 1-0 You'd better have a brandy Geller vs Petrosian, 1962  (B12) Caro-Kann Defense, 18 moves, 1/2-1/2 The man in the mosquito-net hat Kasimdzhanov vs Adams, 2004  (C91) Ruy Lopez, Closed, 44 moves, 1/2-1/2 That sounds like my cue and I don't like it G Tringov vs Fischer, 1965  (B97) Sicilian, Najdorf, 22 moves, 0-1 I smell a knife fight coming! M Yilmaz vs A Jochens, 2012  (A10) English, 32 moves, 1-0 Remember the night of the Governor's Ball... M Fette vs B Perenyi, 1985  (B51) Sicilian, Canal-Sokolsky (Rossolimo) Attack, 51 moves, 0-1 Every moon of Mongo is a kingdom Shredder vs Gull, 2013  (D16) Queen's Gambit Declined Slav, 52 moves, 1/2-1/2 They are all egg-heads Jobava vs Karjakin, 2013  (C53) Giuoco Piano, 28 moves, 1-0 A huge palace built just for two O Ekebjaerg vs G Timmerman, 1991  (C27) Vienna Game, 36 moves, 0-1 Show me how to tune in to Dale C Samarian vs G Gennari, 2005  (A36) English, 41 moves, 1-0 I'm in a rocket racing to get help Nakamura vs Gelfand, 2013  (B33) Sicilian, 45 moves, 0-1 Move the pigs and the goats out Rybka vs Houdini, 2011  (B22) Sicilian, Alapin, 53 moves, 0-1 A King Edward potato two months old B Grachev vs A Reshetnikov, 2011  (A37) English, Symmetrical, 100 moves, 1/2-1/2 Diana Muldaur on 2 channels at once; Hawaii 5-0 & Star Trek J Kotainy vs G Fish, 2013  (B22) Sicilian, Alapin, 46 moves, 1-0 Nil by mouth at Hammersmith - ablation later F Duz-Khotimirsky vs Chigorin, 1907  (A53) Old Indian, 29 moves, 1-0 Nil by mouth still - not another night! Texted Carolina V Malaniuk vs Ivanchuk, 1988  (E20) Nimzo-Indian, 34 moves, 0-1 SO, one more night in Hammersmith. Hopefully out early tomorrow Stein vs E E Book, 1969  (A00) Uncommon Opening, 22 moves, 1-0 Brilliant pun! K Cottrell vs O Popovych, 2003  (E94) King's Indian, Orthodox, 14 moves, 0-1 Pan's Labyrinth D Freeman vs Laufer, 1993  (D87) Grunfeld, Exchange, 29 moves, 1-0 Bird Opening: General (A02) 1-0 Maniac chess by Basman M Basman vs A Whiteley, 1973  (A02) Bird's Opening, 48 moves, 1-0 103 games