Yes, it's time again for another exciting preview of the grand appearance of <Mack n' Dom> at the 5000th <Galway 'get orf my land' Chess Congress> in Ireland, Europe.

We wish the best for our warriors- who are sometimes known as <Mick n' Pom> in an affectionate derogotory-name "reversal."

###############################

A: THE VENUE: Galway is world renowned, not only for its Medieval charm, but also for its enlightened "eco-friendly" city planners. Here is their masterpiece- the teeming Galway Central Business District (now with public loos):

http://optics.nuigalway.ie/pictures...

###############################

B: OPENING CEREMONIES: Although "chess" is the watchword at this historic tournament, the opening ceremonies pay homage to more traditional Irish sports. The festivities open with the players participating in the ancient pastime of <Whack-a-Faerie>, in which the combatants race about the pitch pounding the heads of Faeries back into the ground.

Here is an exciting shot of <Mack n' Dom> participating in last year's action- (That's Dom in front and Mack behind)-

http://www.kennys.ie/News/OldGalway...

###############################

C: PLAYERS' QUARTERS: Here is the magnificent <Salthill Hotel and Baths>, which was constructed in 55 B.C. as a mistletoe factory for local Druids. A close examination of this structure- well OK even a quick glance at this structure- will reveal that it is still used as a mistletoe factory.

Does this mean that <Mack n' Dom> will be forced to kiss each other every time they bump in to each other in the Hotel?

Yes, it does.

Here is a photo (this is a real photograph of Salthill, Galway) of these so august QUARTERS:

http://static.panoramio.com/photos/...

################################

D. THE PLAYING HALL:

The rustic simplicity of the "Stoat and Badger Room" of Urquhart Castle is renowned throughout Old World chess circles. This Hall features a quiet, genteel atmosphere to delight player and spectator alike. The gallery particularly enjoys watching the players scramble for the legendary, and coveted, "Part With the Rock Over Your Head" section of the Hall when it rains.

http://www.walesdirectory.co.uk/tou...

################################

E: THE COMBATANTS: This year the field is expected to be dominated by the 14 year old "wunderbear" <GM Teddy Bear's Picnic>, who shocked the Irish chess world this season when he garnered his last Grandmaster Norm by pounding the perrenial Irish Champion <GM Stig O' Grady>, who had held the National Title since Christ was a corporal. Here is <GM Picnic> sporting traditional Irish garb- and he is, obviously, the "Great Green Hope" in the next World Jr. Chess Championships as well-

http://images.vtbear.com/linkshare/...

Here is a candid shot of English invader <mack>, in which he brazenly employs an archaic form of Visual Pommie Slang in order to indicate the square <c-3>, a nod to the <Sicilian Alapin>, his weapon of choice with the White pieces:

http://geekfitters.com/images/chess...

<Dom Daniel> may be 73 years old, but he augments his chess training with a vigorous regimen of physical activity that keeps him "fighting trim," as this recent photo attests:

http://www.babble.com/CS/blogs/fame...

How does he do it, you might ask? Well here's a clue- a candid photo of <Dom's> seconds in battle against each other. <Dom's> tournament prep normally involves hours of "hard" study consisting of simply watching these two more than able assistants do battle over the board, clad only in sombre traditional Irish dress:

Here is the official website-

<"You know it never has been easy whether you do or you do not resign ..."> What ever *is* "easy"? (two asterisks followed by quotationmarks, hmm)

While pondering the resignation issue, I was thinking about one of your accounts after an Irish Chship, where the GM continues playing on until the bare kings against you, not offering the "courteous draw" - which would rank under a similar sort dilemma on what to do in a comparable situation, but the GM needing a win to save his precious Elo plus Ego.

And godspeed at the Galway Springs tourney, MR. DOMdamthemall !!

Plentiful time to prepare something so devilish, so positively painful, mean, vicious, nasty, cunning, low, sharp, shrewd, sly, slippery, and vile - that ...

Dang, I need to reboot my comp for some reason

Viz- I resign myself to the fact that JR Tolkien's work (such as it is) has been eclipsed by significantly more trite and boneheaded Vampire "novels."

<Jess> Professor Tolkien was also, of course, a gentleman, and quite incapable of imagining what hobbits got up to in the sleazier parts of the Shire. We simply don't know what Frodo did in his free time.

But you know what-

OK no doubt that <JR> can't write poetry as well as <Wallace Stevens>.

But you know what he did do- something that only a few people ever do.

Homer- Conan Doyle- Tolkien- Gene Roddenberry- and God help us <The Bint who Created Harry Potter>-

They all captured the mass public imagination in a very particular way.

They invented a "world" that people liked better than the "real" one.

That's no mean feat.

And I don't think it has anything to do with aesthetics or even <QUOTE UNQUOTE> "good writing."

But they had something. Something huge huge huge.

There are people who think Sherlock was a real person.

And Spock too.

I know James T Kirk exists because I saw him doing an advert.

- "No, I'm from Iowa. I only work in outer space."

In this case, I only just now saw the <Fall E-mail> from CG (it *fell* into my inbox) -- the one with a nice photo of the indubitably long-haired Ms Pogo ... ah, I see *now* ... so that's what you meant. Apart from the fact that I'd posted something on one of her games?

You shouldn't necessarily be alarmed by the timely appearance of the sock <User: ritual sacrifice>, even though it's not me or <Deffi>.

Although if I were you I would be.

Now most know that the 10,000 year old lunar harvest festivals were originally attended by <human male sacrifice to the Harvest Goddess>- in which the "King for a day" gets to shag the most nublie woman in the village and then gets chopped up upon "completion..."

But fewer know these etymological warning signs (for you)-

1. "Dominus"- OK this means "King," really. Everyone knows that "Emperor" derives from the Latin <imperator>, which simply meant a head of state assuming direct command of legions.

However, in post-Republican Rome, the actual office of what we now consider to be the "Emperor" was called <Dominus>, not Imperator.

Viz- you are the King.

2. "Chew Sockpuppet" Yes, here in Korea it is almost <Chu-seok>, the four day lunar harvest festival in which every Korean in the country howls at the moon and talks to her dead grandmother.

Good times? Sure. But they used to be even better. From the "ritual sacrifice" angle.

You're not scared are you? I don't want you to be scared.

WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

DOG PILE ON DOM

Oh wait that's not very flattering...

Sorry <Deffi>!!

HOT CHICK PILE ON DOM

cripes now it sounds too good..

Is that an American vest (aka Waistcoat) or a British vest (an unmentionable undergarment sometimes made of string)? String Vest Theory may yet explain everything.

What did the endlessly recurring Procul Harum song say? A hit in 1602 (lyrical doo-wops by Bill Shagspere), in 1697 (I. Newton on cosmic bongos, man), in 1882 (recorded on wallpaper rolls by Edison, played by running the wallpaper through a combine harvester), plus the 1960s, 1970s, 1980s, and all the other lost decades of the 20th century.

What should I do?

Elsewhere, somebody went into a (to me) incomprehensible riff about American football game scheduling and *parity*. From what I could work out, there is a perfect example of this phenomenon (winners play winners) close at hand. It's called the Swiss system.

Is chess being forgotten? Just like Mani and his lost religion of light... the poor sap claimed to be the last prophet (about 1700 years ago, heh) and an avatar of Jesus, Zoroaster and the Buddha. So, naturally, the Christians, Buddhists and Zoroastrians all charged him with heresy.