<"He loved a wench well; and one time getting up one of the Mayds of Honour up against a tree in a Wood ('twas his first Lady) who seemed at first boarding to be something fearfull of her Honour, and modest, she cryed, Sweet Sir Walter, what doe you me ask; Will you undoe me? Nay, Sweet Sir Walter! Sweet Sir Walter! Sir Walter! At last, as the danger and the pleasure at the same time grew higher, she cried in the extasey, Swisser Swatter Swisser Swatter.">

Sir Walter was Raleigh. For modern readers, I should point out that 'Will you undoe me?' means 'are you trying to ruin my life?' rather than 'open these laces, slave'.

Thanks for those stats.

So who won the Christmas light puzzle? And what was the logic? I'm too tired to click on the link to go look myself, even though it takes a lot more time to type out this request.

Argh. I don't know when that 'hint' - a child could do it - appeared on the xmas lights, #20. I had the right answer written on a piece of paper last night, but I thought I'd already tried it. I *did* try similar numbers, I'm certain.

Then I wake up to my favourite kind of clue, the crypic Mainz one. I started OK with Omega, but figured the camera part was 'lens'. I was wondering whether to try Marin or Meran when it was solved.

+

You seem a little perturbed by advertising. I know the feeling, but we have to tackle these things head-on. As I said to <mack> recently, <Did nobody ever tell you that advertising exists to educate us in the higher forms of truth?>

His reply and the discussion can be seen at this page, where my alter ego lives: Gerry McCarthy

I was once personally monstered by an advert. My girlfriend was an advertising copywriter – with a job writing radio ads for baby food. She also, correctly, suspected me of spending far too much time with another woman, who was also extremely bright and good-looking.

So she wrote an advert, using our real first names, but telling the client that they were popular baby names. It began “Baby F--- and Baby G--- weally wuv one another” – cue gurgling sprogs and “I wuv you” sounds, followed by slurps and smooches and the punchline “But they love their Brand X baby food even more”.

I was dead in the water. Everyone who knew me found it hilarious, with the possible exception of the ‘other’ woman. I thought of it as a penance: in one Thomas Hardy novel, a couple of adulterers are paraded in public on a cart, an old tradition known as a ‘skimmity ride’. My skimmity was through advertising.

<Are you listening, Hans,
To the cry of the Gans,
With the toothbrush stuck on his head?
He blew out his brains
And burned the Re: Mainz
And wound up ineffably dead>

clue alert

COCK A DOODLE DOO M____f____er!!!

AWHOOOOOOOOOOOOOGA

new clue

AWHOOOOOOOOGA

wake up