I am feeling pretty good <now>, in relation to your <chronological> question.

I can't remember who you are though, I'm sorry to say.

Were you involved in the <Russian Mir> space program?

If so, I am authorized to buy all of your secrets on behalf of the Canadian government.

Unfortunately, due to budget restraints I can only pay you in monopoly money.

It's frustrating trying to "talk" to you since you only drop by in a Blitzkrieg and you'd rather pull your own head off than post in your own forum.

I gather you are very busy with <academic hell>.

Thanks for your usual cheer and good humor!!

Remember, there are lots of worse jobs than <Academia>.

Good Humor Ice cream truck salesman, for example.

Actually come to think <Steve Buscemi> made a great movie about being a Ice cream Truck salesman who got lots of young chicks.

Hey you probably check out my new movie "Role Model" starring 'moi' McLovin, yes?

Some new comedies to check out:

Zack and Miri Make a Porno

JCVD: Jean Claude Van Damn can REALLY ACT!

Thanks so much!!

I can always count on you to refrain from making <UntoHoward> statements...

HAHAHAAHAHAAH

get it?

heh

Anyhoo, on a serious note, today's <Yahoo> report.

Four hours of hell....

Two good things- Chess psychology is funny, and I can play endgames better than the people I'm playing on Yahoo. By that I mean that players who are just as good at opening and middle games as me are not as good at endgames as I am, at least at the moment in my current ratings range.

heh

I was outplayed in the middlegame and he had me virtually in Zugzwang.

So I underwent 3 hours of torture refusing to crack.

Total defence, all my pieces tied down.

Horrifying experience. I wouldn't wish it on a dog.

But that's chess.

Anyhoo, so the position's locked down, and although I can't even move, it's not obvious how he should proceed either. All I'm doing is sliding my Rook back and forth between the same two squares, so I amuse myself by trying to figure out how he can actually win.

I see a way for him to win, but he has to make one prophylactic before he does it, or I get a spectacular tactic that gets me back in the game if he ignores the prophylactic.

By "gets me back in the game" I mean gets me into a losing K and P endgame.

OK so he also sees the way to crack open the position but HE OVERLOOKS THE NEED FOR THE ONE <Zeischuwsdufisgggaa> move that's necessary.

That is the German term for "In between move."

So he overlooks this and WHAMMO I get a Knight check with discovered attack on his loose rook and, at least as far as he knows, I'M BACK IN THE GAME.

So then I see how he can win the endgame.

BUT HE DOESN'T!!!

hahahaaha

He failed to convert a K and P with a pawn up on me.

I saw clear as day how he could win, but he didn't see it.

So he took a draw.

HAHAHAAHAHAAHAHAHA

Man do I feel great.

When does a Draw feel like a win?

When does playing very poorly for hours and hours sometimes result in euphoria?

WHEN YOU SHOULD LOSE BUT YOU DONT

HAHAHAAHAHAHAAHAH

wheeeeeeeeeeeeee

This feels as good as any victory I ever had in chess.

Every bit as good.

I feel like I saved Leningrad from the Wehrmacht or something.

I was in a foul, foul mood for hours defending a hopeless position.

THEN THE SWINDLE

HAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAH

In your face buddy!!!

WHOOPA

heh

Any opinions much appreciated.

OK- I've spent all afternoon with my Chess Engine (again), analyzing my game today and comparing it to yesterday's game

Yesterday, I played much, much, better than today- I played much more "objectively strong" chess yesterday than I did today.

Yesterday, most of the game I was in a state of near-euphoria.

Today, most of the game I was in a state of excrutiating torture- against a much, much weaker player than I played yesterday.

So here's the question:

Why did I feel so terrible after yesterday's game, unable to forget the critical position until I started today's game?

And why do I feel so "light and happy" today, despite playing much more poorly against a much poorer player?

Is chess psychology purely "results-based"?

Or am I insane?

Please leave opinions on this or related topics.

I also feel worse when I run a game that I lost through an engine and it shows that I was ok or better at some point

but I do notice that I tend to "feel" that I would have won anyway in the games that I did win and that my opponent was lucky that I only drew or lost, it makes me feel better and justifies me playing more chess...

Or am I insane?>

I think that's right what you said. It's all about story telling.

<Deffi-nately> on the right track as well. I was afraid to think too much about chess on Saturday in case I came to my senses and had a nervous breakdown if I thought too carefully about how much of my time I spend thinking about chess.

What keeps us playing?

The stories.

I like stories.

especially those like <NJORL'S SAGA> with thrilling escapes, triumphs, and tragedies where people get their hands chopped off

"And thier liver cut out
And their heads chopped off,

He bravely turned his tail and ran,

It's interesting how your opponent was capable of tying you up in knots, but not actually finishing you off. Especially since you saw the win.

I think there is psychology there too, he realised he was 'winning' for so long he got complacent and just assumed you would go wrong eventually; but in actual fact, he did!

He was probably eager for the draw even a pawn up in the end through fear of making anymore mistakes, and turning a win into a loss.

Turning a win into a loss happens to be a specialty of mine. Followed hot on the heels by a minor psychological breakdown.

I can't be sure without looking at the position, but what you describe seems to suggest that your pieces, though trapped in the middle-game, did not wander into incoordination.

I think this is a good sign indeed, you are becoming harder to crack!

When I played a lot of team games, saving the half-point was essential and I remember we preferred players who understood this, rather than perhaps objectively slightly stronger ones who had the tendency to crack or lash out under-pressure, and lose.

Climbing the rating ladder is all about securing those half-points and living to fight another day. When I get some more free time I will play some more serious yahoo with this in mind LOL.

I would be interested in the endgame position if you want to post it. I am getting a lot more interested in endgames at the moment and am thinking about completely overhauling my endgame knowledge over the coming months.

Plus, I would like to try and gauge just how much psychological fragmentation had occurred in your opponents mind during that middle-to-endgame transition!

If he analyses the game with a computer, he will be feeling even worse I guess! hehehe

The most confidence sapping question to ask yourself after not winning from a dominating position is 'What do I have to do to beat this guy?'

It is a question many chess-players have encountered in their careers and been unable to cope with, especially short-term, to devastating effect! Probably the latest most high profile case was Kramnik-Kasparov 2000. But I know you are familiar with at least a handful of Fischer examples as well!

Good job <JFQ>

More often than you might think. I once swindled a higiher ranked player in an OTB tournament game in which he had K+np against my K. As he was pushing the pawn I played very quickly (as, foolishly, did he) and ended up with a stalemate in this position (after g4-g3)

click for larger view

I reached out my hand and said "draw" and he thought I was kidding. There were people watching as well. It felt like a win to me.

I am convinced that an understanding of endgames is a huge advantage these days when players rely on tablebases and computer evals to tell them whether they are winning or not.

Good for you.

i read somewhere that Ulf Anderssen was obsessed with drawing lines...

Thanks for dropping by!

If you run across any web-based <Fischer> resources, please post them here for me or email them to me.

Glad I'm not forgotten ;)
Actually I'm not in Korea atm - I moved to the States a few months ago, for my grad school. And last month I played against GM Yuri Shulman in a simul, which was prepared by chess club students here!

How about you? Are you planning to take a part in any tourneys held there? It's been such a long time!

Good work man!

Unfortunately I'm a long way from <Seoul> or any place that has a chess club let alone a tournament.

I'm not sure what's going to happen.

Right now I'm playing a lot on the Internet but I'm really dying to get back to my Chess Club in Canada.

or any Chess Club anywhere for that matter.

I hope you can find a local chess club there. I play online chess a lot, too, on playchess.com and FICS. Try FICS, it's really cool, <totally free> and people there are mostly nice. You will really like it. Recently I've been playing some tourney games (<2008 Gauntlet open>, so they call it) on FICS. Maybe we can play there!