User Profile: phony benoni

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Phony Benoni
Member since Feb-10-06 · Last seen Jun-11-22

Greetings, O Seeker After Knowledge! You have arrived in Dearborn, Michigan (whether you like it or not), and are reading words of wisdom from a player rated 2938--plus or minus 1000 points.
However, I've retired from serious play--not that I ever took playing chess all that seriously. You only have to look at my games to see that. These days I pursue the simple pleasures of finding games that are bizarre or just plain funny. I'd rather enjoy a game than analyze it.
For the record, my name is David Moody. This probably means nothing to you unless you're a longtime player from Michigan, though it's possible that if you attended any US Opens from 1975-1999 we might have crossed paths. Lucky you.
If you know me at all, you'll realize that most of my remarks are meant to be humorous. I do this deliberately, so that if my analysis stinks to High Heaven I can always say that I was just joking.
As you can undoubtedly tell from my sparkling wit, I'm a librarian in my spare time. Even worse, I'm a cataloger, which means I keep log books for cattle. Also, I'm not one of those extroverts who sit at the Reference Desk and help you with research. Instead, I spend all day staring at a computer screen updating and maintaining information in the library's catalog. The general public thinks Reference Librarians are dull. Reference Librarians think Catalogers are dull.
My greatest achievement in chess, other than tricking you into reading this, was probably mating with king, bishop and knight against king in a tournament game. I have to admit that this happened after an adjournment, and that I booked up like crazy before resuming. By the way, the fact I have had adjourned games shows you I've been around too long.
My funniest moment occurred when I finally got a chance to pull off a smothered mate in actual play. You know, 1.Nf7+ Kg8 2.Nh6+ Kh8 3.Qg8+ Rxg8 4.Nf7#. When I played the climactic queen check my opponent looked at the board in shocked disbelief and said, "But that's not mate! I can take the queen!"

Finally, I must confess that I once played a positional move, back around 1982. I'll try not to let that happen again.

>> Click here to see phony benoni's game collections.

   Phony Benoni has kibitzed 18634 times to chessgames [more...]

   Jun-11-22 M Blau vs Keres, 1959

Phony Benoni: Not a good recommendation for the DERLD. Out of 59 moves, White makes only three in Black's half of the board. And two of those conist of 3.Bb5 and 6.Bxc6.

   Jun-11-22 chessgames.com chessforum

Phony Benoni: Er, it's back. Karpov vs Timman, 1988

   Jun-10-22 Orlo Milo Rolo

Phony Benoni: Marco!

   Jun-10-22 Lilienthal vs Bondarevsky, 1947

Phony Benoni: Another one for you King Hunters. Black's monarch travels fron g8 to b8, then takes the Great Circle Route back to h3 before calling it a day.

   Jun-10-22 GrahamClayton chessforum

Phony Benoni: <GrahamClayton> I've posted a question for you at L T Magee vs J Holland, 1948

   Jun-10-22 L T Magee vs E L Holland, 1948

Phony Benoni: <GrahamClayton> The source you cite, <Chess Review, May 1948, p. 24>, gives Black's name as <E Holland> "Chess Life" (June 5, 1948, p. 1) has a table of results giving <E L Holland>. That form also appears in USCF rating supplements for a player fro ...

   Jun-09-22 Biographer Bistro

Phony Benoni: SkinnVer Here Among the Fold?

   Jun-09-22 Flohr vs Bondarevsky, 1947

Phony Benoni: Black's bishop makes me think of Godzilla emerging from the depths of the ocean to wreak havoc. However, in the end it's his Two Little Friends who steal the show. Well, maybe not so litt.

   Jun-06-22 W Ritson-Morry vs G T Crown, 1947

Phony Benoni: it was the last round. Rison-Morry was mired in last place. These things happen.

   Jun-06-22 W Adams vs M Kagan, 1947

Phony Benoni: Some more informztion. The game was published in <Chess Review>, March 1948, p. 23. Black's name is given as "M Kagan", and the location as "Massachusetts". There is no other game data, but I think we can now safely assume Black is <Milton Kagan>. Earlier in the ...

indicates a reply to the comment.

Living in the Past

< Earlier Kibitzing · PAGE 34 OF 914 · Later Kibitzing>
Aug-28-08		WannaBe: This link does not work: http://research.udmercy.edu/find/un...

Aug-28-08		Phony Benoni: <WannaBe> Thanks for your offer, but I have no idea what you're talking about. Other people design the system; I just dump stuff into it. I was only interested if people outside the university could access the database; sometimes, we have trouble with off-campus access. If you'd like, I can put you in touch with our IT department head, Dr. Merkin Frankenstein.

Aug-28-08		Phony Benoni: <WannaBe>. OK, I talked to some of our people in the know, and they said something about a Java enabled Auk browser operating a Pascal Perl that's Jetson compatible. Or maybe it was an SQL Python squeezing Basic COBOL out of Netscare, IE, and BarneyRubble. I'm really not sure.

Aug-28-08		WannaBe: Sounds like a Mickey Mouse operation to me. :-P

Aug-28-08		Phony Benoni: That's enough frivolity for now. It's time to get back to the serious business of this forum. WORST MOVE OF THE YEAR: SET 7, 1991 <#1: BLACK TO PLAY> click for larger view Another one of those kings with attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder: <1...Ke4?? 2.Ke2!>. <#2: WHITE TO PLAY> click for larger view In this one, the diagnosis is "Wrong Rook!" 1.Rdxc7+ forces mate next move (1...Kb8 2.Nd7#, or 1...Kd8 2.Rd7#). After <1.Rcxc7+??>, White has no more than a perpetual check and wound up losing when he spurned it. <#3: BLACK TO PLAY> click for larger view Black seemed to have gotten the sides of the board mixed up, or perhaps he thought he was playing White. At any rate, he <castled> by moving his king to b8 and the rook on a8 to c8! White was either confused, thought they were playing Fischer Random, or just didn't care--he simply went ahead and played <2.d7>, winning a rook and the game. <#4: WHITE TO PLAY> click for larger view With White a piece up, the game proceeded <1.Bh3+?? Kg7??>. What's so bad about that? Black missed 1...Rf8+, winning a rook! <#5: BLACK TO PLAY> click for larger view Time for another selfmate: <1...Ne7?? 2.Nxf6#>. <#6: WHITE TO PLAY> click for larger view Oh, come on. White did not try to avoid the threat of ...Nxf3+ by castling. Give him some credit. He saved the f-pawn with <1.f4??>.

Aug-29-08		WannaBe: Number 3 and number 5 are just hilarious, 1/2 vote to each!

Aug-29-08		arsen387: I like #5 too, but #3 is outstanding

Aug-29-08		YouRang: 1988 -- #4 is a great case of double blindness. 1987 -- I have a soft spot for #4 there too, since I've sort of done that, except I was on the side with the K+Q trying to beat the K+R (I've never completely figured out the right technique). After working long and hard on it, I stumbled into that drawing skewer. I should pay check out your forum more often -- always good stuff here. :-)

Aug-30-08		ravel5184: I like #3

Aug-30-08		YouRang: Tough choices...mine are: 1989 - #1 1990 - #5 :-)

Aug-30-08		YouRang: 1991 - #3, "Castling into it" is one thing, but doing it illegally is special.

Aug-30-08		Phony Benoni: <Gang> This time, I strongly agree with the consensus for #3. Such originality must be rewarded. <YouRang> Thanks for stopping by. It's a pleasure to have such distinguished visitors.

Aug-31-08		YouRang: <Phony Benoni><Thanks for stopping by. It's a pleasure to have such distinguished visitors.> I must admit, one of my reasons for stopping by was to hobnob with your distinguished visitors. :-)

Sep-01-08		Phony Benoni: And now, while we're on the topic of distinguished visitors: WORST MOVE OF THE YEAR: SET 8, 1992 <#1: WHITE TO PLAY> click for larger view 1.Nf5! would force a draw by stalemate or wrong-colored rook pawn; Instead, White lost after <1.Kb1?>. <#2: BLACK TO PLAY> click for larger view Stalemate worked the other way after <1...h3? 2.Bxh3!>, and there was no way for Black to win. The careful 1...Kg3 would have won. <#3: BLACK TO PLAY> click for larger view Yes, Black is lost anyway--but he finds a creative way to shorten the agony: <1...Qb8 2.Nd7+!>. <#4: BLACK TO PLAY> click for larger view Tired of being checked all over the place, Black solved his problems with <1...Ne7?? 2.Qf8#>. <#5: WHITE TO PLAY> click for larger view It takes some ingenuity to fall into mate-in-one is this position, but White finds a way: <1.h3?? Rxh3#!>. At least he didn't get mated on the back rank. <#6: WHITE TO PLAY> click for larger view White prepared to castle with <1.Be2?>, and Black prepared to take White's queen with <1...Bc2!>.

Sep-01-08		YouRang: 1991 - <worst move> I was going to pick #1 until I saw #5 -- a reasonable looking move on the surface, although it is in fact the Worst Move Possible. :-)

Sep-01-08		WannaBe: I like number 5...

Sep-01-08		whiteshark: #5 in 1992 (made a Luftloch and thus got mated) --- Belated #3 in 1991

Sep-02-08		ravel5184: #5 for me.

Sep-02-08		YouRang: <YouRang: 1991 - <worst move> I was going to pick #1 until I saw #5 -- a reasonable looking move on the surface, although it is in fact the Worst Move Possible. :-)> Oops - make that <1992>. :-\

Sep-02-08		ravel5184: Plus, it's not even THE worst move possible. 1. h4 is basically the same.

Sep-02-08		Phony Benoni: <Gang> It looks unanimous again, and again I am inclined to agree. #5 was clearly the most creative of the bunch. I also regret that 1.h4 would work just as badly, but, hey, 1.h3 was still worse. After all, it lost a pawn in addition to allowing mate. However, that may not have been Michigan's worst move of 1992. <WARNING: STORY TIME!> There were several principles I always tried to follow in preparing this feature. One was total anonymity. I figured that the winner would have no reason to be proud of the game, and the loser might be a member of the NRA. Another principle was ratings irrelevance. The feature was meant to be an equal opportunity employer. There was a game in 1992 which contained a Worst Move of the Year candidate, but which I wound up publishing as part of a tournament report with the names of the players and their ratings (which added additional tarnish to the occasion). I'm not going to reveal the players' names here, since they would probably mean nothing to you. Also, since the game, White has passed away and Black has changed his name--neither event, I might emphasize, being a result of this game. But you do need to know that White was rated 2124, Black 2488. click for larger view At this point, White decided a trade of queens would be a good idea, and played <1.Qe5>. Black agreed that the trade was fine with him, but wanting to do it on his own terms replied <1...Re8??>--whereupon White, like any good 2124 player, executed his plan with <2.Qxe7??>. As White told me the story afterwards, he got up from the board a few minutes later to stretch his legs and a kibitzer whispered to him, "Couldn't you have played 2.Qxg7#?" White played with a definite lack of concentration after that point.

Sep-04-08		ahmadov: What happened to you? In our first game I was completely frightened, this time you do not seem that aggressive...

Sep-04-08		Phony Benoni: <ahmadov> I haven't changed. Perhaps you have improved your own play.

Sep-05-08		ahmadov: <Phony Benoni: <ahmadov> I haven't changed. Perhaps you have improved your own play.> With a few recent lost games I can hardly confirm that, I had some good games on QA lately though...

Sep-05-08		Phony Benoni: Of course, there's this ongoing project which may have been adversely affecting my play. WORST MOVE OF THE YEAR: SET 9, 1993 <#1: WHITE TO PLAY> click for larger view You'd be surprised how quickly you can lose a rook and pawn ending: <1.Kc5?? Rd7!>. <#2: BLACK TO PLAY> click for larger view With two rooks apiece, it's even easier: <1...Rf6?? 2.Rd5#>. <#3: BLACK TO PLAY> click for larger view Back in 1993, players were still permitted to write their move on the scoresheet before making it. Indeed, many students were taught to write down their move, then check for blunders before playing it. That's what happened here: Black wrote down 1...gxf5, checked for blunders--and found one by forgetting what he had written down and playing <1...fxg5??> instead, resigning after <2.Qxg7+>. <#4: BLACK TO PLAY> click for larger view Everyone knows the old Bxh7+ trick winning the queen, right? Wrong! <1...Qa2?? 2.Bxh7+>. <#5: WHITE TO PLAY> click for larger view OK, but <absolutely> everyone knows about smothered mate, right? Wrong! White not only missed a smothered mate by 1.Qg8+! Kxg8 (1...Rxg8 2.Nf7#) 2.Nf6+ Kh8 3.Nf7#, but after <1.Ne6? Bxe6 2.Qxe6 Qc5+ 3.Kh1 Nf2+ 4.Kg1?? Nh3+ 5.Kh1 Qg1+ 6.Rxg1 Nf2#> he got smothered himself! <#6: BLACK TO PLAY> click for larger view Black attempted to keep the queen active with <1...Qe6??>, but after <2.Ng5!> she turned out to be insufficiently active after all.

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