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Feb-08-07
 | | jessicafischerqueen: LOL <Dom>
The old "unplugged cable" ploy, eh?
That's the 21st century version of
"My dog ate my homework"?
(Apoligies to <twinlark>) Thanks for the warm welcome to my chess game. I think <Mack> would be happy to post his in here too. He seems to be a very polite sort, I like the cut of his jib. He's probably worried about taking advantage of your good graces. I stopped worrying about that because yer just so unrelentingly welcoming. spam, spammity spaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaam |
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Feb-08-07
| | jessicafischerqueen: <Dom> your acolytes are not so nervous about your temporary absences since <Eyal> created the <Domaholics> support group in his forum. Should take some of the pressure off you as CG.com arbiter of all things erudite, arcane, and inane... Still, we needya alla same. If only to supply adequate interpretations of <Billy Bunter>, <Sid the Sexist>, and <Johnny Fartpants>. You'll be pleased to know that <VIZ> magazine is available in the colonies... |
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Feb-08-07
 | | Domdaniel: Very pleased, ma'am, fnarr fnarr.
Mr Mack and I have been chatting merrily away ever since I stumbled across the secret code words - from a song by the Bonzo Dog Doodah Band and the sainted Viv Stanshall. Just say "perhaps you'd care to wash your hands before you come in" and you'll be fine. If not actually Reuben. Reuben, Rubens, Pee Wee Herman, no, don't go there, stop now, phew. |
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Feb-08-07
| | Domdaniel: Great Wireless Excuses, #38:
"The dog ate part of the electro-magnetic spectrum..." |
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Feb-08-07
| | Domdaniel: Scientologist Chess Principles...
Bishops are evil beings from the galaxy T-71. They should be captured at every opportunity. If you blunder, it's not *your* fault, it's the piece that moved. Plug cables into it, attach a US navy galvanometer (circa 1950) and repeat "Why did you go to c6? Do you have negative feelings about Ron? Does the name Mapother mean anything to you?" Repeat.
Tie a grey rag round the offending piece and ignore it for the rest of the game. Any pawn reaching the 8th rank immediately goes Clear. It outranks you and has the right to your chair, while you must take its place on the board. |
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| Feb-08-07 | | Eyal: Speaking of the dog-computer connection, I believe the original saying was: Home computers are being called upon to perform many new functions, including the consumption of homework formerly eaten by the dog |
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Feb-08-07
| | Domdaniel: And this has no connection to the line "on the internet nobody knows you're a dog" which has got me into trouble once already...? Arf arf. |
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| Feb-08-07 | | Eyal: Speaking of the dog/homework theme, I seem to recall a series of cartoons I saw once: In one of them a dog was sitting behind a desk in an office, and another dog was cleaning the room. The dog behind the desk was saying: <The only difference between you and me, Flanders, is that I read the homework before I ate it.> In another, two dogs are looking disgustedly at their food, which is a bunch of papers, and saying <Oh no, not homework again.> In another, a dog is sitting at a restaurant, looking at the menu, and asking the waiter: <Is the homework fresh?> And finally, there was one where a father was talking to his son and saying: <In my elementary school days, we were too poor to have a dog. If we wanted our homework eaten, we had to eat it ourselves.> |
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| Feb-08-07 | | Eyal: <"on the internet nobody knows you're a dog"> That's also from a cartoon, btw... http://www.unc.edu/depts/jomc/acade... |
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Feb-08-07
| | Domdaniel: Is there also a genre of <the only difference between...> jokes? I was chatting to a chess-playing diplomat in the street once, when he pointed to a guy holding up an advertising sign and said "the only difference between my job and that guy's is that I have a desk to rest my newspaper on..." Next time we met he was an ambassador. |
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| Feb-08-07 | | Eyal: A genre? That's an art-form of its own, I think... |
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| Feb-08-07 | | JoeWms: <Jessicafischerqueen> Three in the afternoon in the west. Where are you hanging out now? It's 11 p.m. in Dublin, 1 a.m. in Tel Aviv. I posted a message for you on my forum. |
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Feb-08-07
| | jessicafischerqueen: <Joe> got your message, and I will accomodate your request, with pleasure. Apologies for the inconvenience. <where am I hanging out now> About a hundred kilometres up the mighty Fraser river at my Mom's, where I live. In front of my computer, pretending to do schoolwork. <Dublin> Do you and Dom ever get together in real life? Jess |
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Feb-08-07
| | jessicafischerqueen: <Dom> <Eyal> Thanks for the dog/homework jokes, still giggling here. OK <Dom> I'm gonna try posting my favorite chess game in your forum now. Might take me awhile, I gots to download it from my Lap Top first and edit it etc. etc. Mrs. A. Highbottom,
Shepherd's Bush. |
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Feb-08-07
| | Domdaniel: <Jess> I think Joe's reference to Dublin time was that rare form of gentlemanly courtesy, the act of noting the local time in the host forum.... Ah, the mighty Fraser, eh? Anywhere near Kamloops? |
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Feb-08-07
| | Domdaniel: Shepherd's Bush is a London location, innit? The Dublin equivalent might be Dolphin's Barn. Or Ball's Bridge. The Ancients knew how to name their suburbs all right. |
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Feb-08-07
| | jessicafischerqueen: <Dom> nope Kamloops is five hours east of "here" which is <Chilliwack>, a <Stolo> indian word which means, literally, <arse of the red fish>. They used to pickle the arse of the Sockeye Salmon as a delicacy here. <Shepherd's Bush> right as usual, it's in London. Only reason I heard about it was because <Roger Daltrey> grew up there, was a <sheet metal worker> before falling in with that motley <Pete>. I'm busy editing my annotations so I don't take up a huge page when I post my game. Thanks for letting me do this, <Eyal> will no doubt let me know how many mistakes I made in the game, the first time I beat anyone over 1500 on Yahoo. Cheeeeers |
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Feb-08-07
| | jessicafischerqueen: <Ball's Bridge> LOL |
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Feb-08-07
| | jessicafischerqueen: OK here goes: When this game was played I was around 1375 and he was around 1550, Yahoo ratings. <Jessica> v. <Really Crabby Guy>
2006, Yahoo, 10 minutes per move.
1.e4 e5
2.Nf3 Nc6
3.d4 Nf6
4.d5?
An aggressive, but surely unsound move. Black becomes visibly excited and hurries his response... 4. ...Ne7
5.Nxe5 Nxe4
6.Qf3 Nf6
7.c4 d6
Playing like a drunken Catholic schoolgirl, White overextends her Queenside pawns in a frantic attempt to protect the virginity of her D-pawn, as Black easily chases away the Knight Chaperone on e5... 8.Nd3 c6
9.dxc6 bxc6
10.Bg5 Bg4
11.Qe3 Qa5+
White now considers resigning and driving quickly to the liquor store... 12.Nc3 o-o-o?
Black cannot wait to get a rook in play on White's hopeless E-file... 13.Bxf6 gxf6
14.b4?! Qf5
15.Qxa7 Qe6+
16.Be2 Qxc4
click for larger viewBlack closes in for the kill... He knows that White's Queen is useless without support, and that White cannot castle any time this millenium. Plus he appears to be growing tired of typing <Hurry up and move dammit!> in the conversation box... White briefly considers suicide, but realizes she may take solace later by watching the Brazil-Croatia game on TV... decides to play a few more moves... 17.Bxg4+ f5
18.Rc1 Qxd3??
19.Be2!
White merely looking to drive away the Black Queen here, and find some way to castle at some point, but after about five minutes of waiting for Black to move, only then does she realize that she has inadvertently trapped the Black Queen!! 19. ...Rd7
20.Qa8+ RESIGN |
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| Feb-08-07 | | Eyal: <jess> Ok, here goes: 4.d5: nothing wrong with this move whatsoever - it should give White a very comfortable edge. The problem was rather with 7.c4? - after 7.Nc3 instead, Black is in a VERY awkward position, especially considering he can't play d6 because of Bb5+ (which c4 prevents). After that, until Black's 14th move, the position is roughly equal - maybe there are some inaccuracies, but nothing very remarkable. 14...Qf5??, however, is a very bad mistake - the black queen can't abandon her king like that. Should have been Qa3 or Qb6. And 16...Qxc4?? (instead of Bxe2) is the cruncher - in your diagram position Black is lost, and White can win on the spot with 17.Na4, with the double threat of Nb6+ and Rc1. Black's last chance to give a bit of a fight was with 17...Qxg4, but even then 18.b5 should win without too much trouble. |
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| Feb-08-07 | | Eyal: So one might say that you played this game a lot better than you thought... |
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Feb-08-07
| | jessicafischerqueen: <Eyal> thank you so much for your analysis!! I must have looked at this game a dozen times, and didn't see Na4. That's quite a bit better than 17. Bxg4+. I think this guy expected an easy win and 14. Qf5 is sloppy, as you say. He was really, really rude as well.
Which increased my enjoyment of the game mightily!! I like (need) to take my time with my moves. Which is why I likes 10 minute a move control so much. My adrenaline was through the roof the entire course of the game. And after, I ran around the block, leaping like a <Thompson's Gazelle>. |
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Feb-08-07
| | jessicafischerqueen: <better than I thought> LOL thanks, but I'm not kidding about not even realizing I had trapped his Queen for a good five minutes... |
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| Feb-09-07 | | Elixir of Life: Domdaniel: I think it is now a good time to join the GMYS vs The World game. We are already getting into meaningful discussions, and even if you don't with to analyze, at least comment on the forum organizational system. (If you don't know who is organizing the forums, it is Artar1). |
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Feb-09-07
| | Domdaniel: <Jess> Hadda go last night before your mini-epic showed up. The Drunken Schoolgirl attack, eh? Can be highly effective at close quarters, but maybe you need to be OTB for maximum effect... I used to play the Scotch when I was the schoolboy equivalent... Now I'll look at it properly, OK? |
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