User Profile: phony benoni

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Phony Benoni
Member since Feb-10-06 · Last seen Jun-11-22

Greetings, O Seeker After Knowledge! You have arrived in Dearborn, Michigan (whether you like it or not), and are reading words of wisdom from a player rated 2938--plus or minus 1000 points.
However, I've retired from serious play--not that I ever took playing chess all that seriously. You only have to look at my games to see that. These days I pursue the simple pleasures of finding games that are bizarre or just plain funny. I'd rather enjoy a game than analyze it.
For the record, my name is David Moody. This probably means nothing to you unless you're a longtime player from Michigan, though it's possible that if you attended any US Opens from 1975-1999 we might have crossed paths. Lucky you.
If you know me at all, you'll realize that most of my remarks are meant to be humorous. I do this deliberately, so that if my analysis stinks to High Heaven I can always say that I was just joking.
As you can undoubtedly tell from my sparkling wit, I'm a librarian in my spare time. Even worse, I'm a cataloger, which means I keep log books for cattle. Also, I'm not one of those extroverts who sit at the Reference Desk and help you with research. Instead, I spend all day staring at a computer screen updating and maintaining information in the library's catalog. The general public thinks Reference Librarians are dull. Reference Librarians think Catalogers are dull.
My greatest achievement in chess, other than tricking you into reading this, was probably mating with king, bishop and knight against king in a tournament game. I have to admit that this happened after an adjournment, and that I booked up like crazy before resuming. By the way, the fact I have had adjourned games shows you I've been around too long.
My funniest moment occurred when I finally got a chance to pull off a smothered mate in actual play. You know, 1.Nf7+ Kg8 2.Nh6+ Kh8 3.Qg8+ Rxg8 4.Nf7#. When I played the climactic queen check my opponent looked at the board in shocked disbelief and said, "But that's not mate! I can take the queen!"

Finally, I must confess that I once played a positional move, back around 1982. I'll try not to let that happen again.

>> Click here to see phony benoni's game collections.

   Phony Benoni has kibitzed 18634 times to chessgames [more...]

   Jun-11-22 M Blau vs Keres, 1959

Phony Benoni: Not a good recommendation for the DERLD. Out of 59 moves, White makes only three in Black's half of the board. And two of those conist of 3.Bb5 and 6.Bxc6.

   Jun-11-22 chessgames.com chessforum

Phony Benoni: Er, it's back. Karpov vs Timman, 1988

   Jun-10-22 Orlo Milo Rolo

Phony Benoni: Marco!

   Jun-10-22 Lilienthal vs Bondarevsky, 1947

Phony Benoni: Another one for you King Hunters. Black's monarch travels fron g8 to b8, then takes the Great Circle Route back to h3 before calling it a day.

   Jun-10-22 GrahamClayton chessforum

Phony Benoni: <GrahamClayton> I've posted a question for you at L T Magee vs J Holland, 1948

   Jun-10-22 L T Magee vs E L Holland, 1948

Phony Benoni: <GrahamClayton> The source you cite, <Chess Review, May 1948, p. 24>, gives Black's name as <E Holland> "Chess Life" (June 5, 1948, p. 1) has a table of results giving <E L Holland>. That form also appears in USCF rating supplements for a player fro ...

   Jun-09-22 Biographer Bistro

Phony Benoni: SkinnVer Here Among the Fold?

   Jun-09-22 Flohr vs Bondarevsky, 1947

Phony Benoni: Black's bishop makes me think of Godzilla emerging from the depths of the ocean to wreak havoc. However, in the end it's his Two Little Friends who steal the show. Well, maybe not so litt.

   Jun-06-22 W Ritson-Morry vs G T Crown, 1947

Phony Benoni: it was the last round. Rison-Morry was mired in last place. These things happen.

   Jun-06-22 W Adams vs M Kagan, 1947

Phony Benoni: Some more informztion. The game was published in <Chess Review>, March 1948, p. 23. Black's name is given as "M Kagan", and the location as "Massachusetts". There is no other game data, but I think we can now safely assume Black is <Milton Kagan>. Earlier in the ...

indicates a reply to the comment.

Living in the Past

< Earlier Kibitzing · PAGE 321 OF 914 · Later Kibitzing>
Dec-14-11		Travis Bickle: Phony, I agree Gruden has a high octane philosphy but he won The Superbowl with Defense with The Tampa Bay Bucs!

Dec-14-11		Phony Benoni: <Travis> I have to say that a coach named "Lovie" never seemed right for the Bears. It's just that Gruden strikes me as the Billy Martin or Larry Brown type of coach, a quick fix who soon wears out his welcome. Thing is, proven winners like that do get a lot of welcomes!

Dec-15-11		Shams: <keypusher><Didn't they take 11 minutes to sell out, though? I'm sure P.T. Barnum never took pity on the customers just because the economy was bad. :-)> An unofficial poll of my friends (100% of them bleeding hearts compared to you) has yielded zero support for my position and plenty for P.T. Barnum's. Sample exchange: <Shams>: "If the Packers sold cigarette lighters branded with the Green Bay helmet for $400 a pop, would you think that was fine too?" <Friend of Shams>: "Sure, why not?" <Shams>: ...

Dec-16-11		WannaBe: Lies, d@mned lies, and statistics... Question, who 2 teams rank 31st and 32nd in total yards allowed. (A.K.A. Worst Defence...)

Dec-16-11		WannaBe: Featured games of this weekend, especially amongst CG.com (honoured) members: Sea-Chi: <Shams> & <Travis Bickle> will battle it out at Michigan Ave. PPV. Det-Oak: <Phony Benoni> & <WannaBe> will battle it out in a match fictional characters on Sesame St. The rest of you can fight it out on Elms Street. Or Maybe Sunset Boulevard.

Dec-16-11		Phony Benoni: <WannaBe> Without checking, I'll guess Green Bay and New England, though not necessarily in that order. Otherwise, you wouldn't have asked the question.

Dec-16-11		WannaBe: Ding it!! Am I that predictable?!?!?!

Dec-17-11		Phony Benoni: <WannaBe> No, the question was. After a while, it's easy to tell when someone is trying to put an Unbelievable Fact over on you.

Dec-17-11		WannaBe: More incredible stats, (I better get them in, before I am put on the ignore list for this weekend's game...) Philadelphia is #4 in total yards, and Carolina is #5. Denver is #23, and San Francisco is #26. http://espn.go.com/nfl/statistics/t... Houston have given up the least yards per game (274.9) while Cincinnati (#6) have given up 314.8 per game, Washington is #10, and Philadelphia is #11, then it's Miami #12, Seattle #13, Kansas City #14. http://espn.go.com/nfl/statistics/t... Remember, Defence wins Championships!! Goooooooo Eagles!!

Dec-17-11		Jim Bartle: Yards given up can be deceiving, of course. I remember the 49ers played the Raiders for the first time in 1980, a big deal in the Bay Area. The 49ers won 38-7, and it was something like 24-0 at halftime. Still, Raider fans wrote in to the papers saying the Raiders really were better, since they'd gained more yards. Their superiority just wasn't shown on the scoreboard. What happened, of course, is that SF had a huge yardage as well as points lead after the first half, then played extremely conservatively in the second half, running on almost every play. (It was the last game of the season and they were going for the record for fewest sacks in a season, so Brodie just didn't call any pass plays.) Naturally the Raiders caught up in yardage, but didn't score much and it didn't matter. I'll bet if you look at yardage in the first half for all teams it would look a lot more reasonable, as that's where the stats show in most blowouts.

Dec-17-11		Jim Bartle: Oops, that first 49ers-Raiders game was in 1970, not 1980. (Obviously, if John Brodie was playing.)

Dec-17-11		Phony Benoni: I may be skipping the local weekly sports roundups Sunday night. Pistons and Red Wings lost last night. Wayne State went down in the Division II title game, and University of Detroit got edged 81-75 by #17 Mississippi. If the Lions get stomped tomorrow it's going to be a sad half-hour on all three stations. And I have bad feelings about the game. Oakland can run; Detroit has trouble stopping the run. There will be physical play, and the Lions haven't proved they can keep themselves under control. By the way, a little sidelight to the Suh Stomp on Thanksgiving Day. News came out this week that the Packers had been baiting Suh the entire game by untying his shoes whenever he got caught in a pile-up. This supposedly happened three times before the explosion. Anybody for penny loafers with cleats?

Dec-17-11		Jim Bartle: "...and the Lions haven't proved they can keep themselves under control." And against the Raiders, who have always been models of comportment and sportsmanship. I see a fairly easy Detroit win. With LaMonica out, I think Landry can get it done. Raiders #2 QB is this untested guy Stabler.

Dec-17-11		Jim Bartle: Since the Raiders are a subject here, here are some great calls from announcer Bill King, starting at about 1:45. Even George Blanda makes it in. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nd9P... King was just a great announcer, starting with the Warriors in 1962 when the team only drew 3,000-4000 to each game, and he had to re-create the road games via teletype.

Dec-17-11		Deus Ex Alekhina: A former Packer said that what irked Ndamukung "Romper Stomper" Suh was that the Pack kept untieing his shoes in pile-ups, driving Suh bonkers. Actually more likely, there was some weiner-grabbing, twiddling with his balls, possibly even snorting a snot rocket on him. If Suh gets a much longer suspension next time, maybe he should do what Lion Alex Karras did nearly 50 years ago when suspended for gambling. Karras became a professional wrestler and had a bar-clearing brawl with his up-coming wrestling opponent William "Dick the Bruiser" Afflis, a former Green Bay Packer.

Dec-17-11		Resignation Trap: You may wish to edit your Game Collection: USSR Championship 1929 . In <Quarterfinal 2>, the messed-up name is Sergei Mudrov .

Dec-17-11		Phony Benoni: <Resignation Trap> Done; thanks for catching it.

Dec-18-11		WannaBe: http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/artic... Better post that, before the game starts, and <Phony Benoni> adds me to his ignore list! :-)))

Dec-18-11		WannaBe: Better get my throat warmed up here... <C'mon ref, that's not a face mask! His fingers got caught!!> <Holding, holding, what are you lookin' for? Your specs? Mr. McGoo? I mean Ed Hochulli...> <That's a late hit, spearing! Helmet to helmet! Throw the flag!!> <Pass interefence, that 23 is all over him! Pass #$@!#(* inteference!!> :-)

Dec-18-11		Phony Benoni: Is this the Christmas season or April Fools Day? KC up on Green Bay? Colts ahead by two touchdowns? Redskins beating the Giants?

Dec-18-11		Phony Benoni: And it's official--no more "0"s in the NFL standings!

Dec-18-11		WannaBe: Well, TB is 4-1<0>, Houston is 1<0>-4, and if you look under the 'T' column, I see a whole bunch of <0>'s. :-) This is for <Travis Bickle>, in case his TV is no longer 'working'. http://www.bestbuy.com/site/olstemp... Did you know... Chicago played 5 straight games against the 'West', Beat San Diego, lost @ Oakland, lost to KC, lost @ Denver, and today, lost to Seattle, good thing NFL didn't schedule Arizona or/and St. Louis or/and San Francisco for the Bears. C'mon, that was holding, holding!! You blind ref! And head linesmen, and side judge, and line judge, y'all blind as a mole!

Dec-18-11		Jim Bartle: Or to quote the immortal Bob Uecker from the second deck: "He missed the tag!"

Dec-18-11		WannaBe: Ah, the Polish Bazooka delivers yet another field goal. Good #1 pick by A. Davis, what a genius.

Dec-18-11		Jim Bartle: Misprint? Denver has 170 yards running in the first half. Now if they could just hold onto the ball.

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