User Profile: Phony Benoni

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Phony Benoni
Member since Feb-10-06 · Last seen Jun-11-22

Greetings, O Seeker After Knowledge! You have arrived in Dearborn, Michigan (whether you like it or not), and are reading words of wisdom from a player rated 2938--plus or minus 1000 points.
However, I've retired from serious play--not that I ever took playing chess all that seriously. You only have to look at my games to see that. These days I pursue the simple pleasures of finding games that are bizarre or just plain funny. I'd rather enjoy a game than analyze it.
For the record, my name is David Moody. This probably means nothing to you unless you're a longtime player from Michigan, though it's possible that if you attended any US Opens from 1975-1999 we might have crossed paths. Lucky you.
If you know me at all, you'll realize that most of my remarks are meant to be humorous. I do this deliberately, so that if my analysis stinks to High Heaven I can always say that I was just joking.
As you can undoubtedly tell from my sparkling wit, I'm a librarian in my spare time. Even worse, I'm a cataloger, which means I keep log books for cattle. Also, I'm not one of those extroverts who sit at the Reference Desk and help you with research. Instead, I spend all day staring at a computer screen updating and maintaining information in the library's catalog. The general public thinks Reference Librarians are dull. Reference Librarians think Catalogers are dull.
My greatest achievement in chess, other than tricking you into reading this, was probably mating with king, bishop and knight against king in a tournament game. I have to admit that this happened after an adjournment, and that I booked up like crazy before resuming. By the way, the fact I have had adjourned games shows you I've been around too long.
My funniest moment occurred when I finally got a chance to pull off a smothered mate in actual play. You know, 1.Nf7+ Kg8 2.Nh6+ Kh8 3.Qg8+ Rxg8 4.Nf7#. When I played the climactic queen check my opponent looked at the board in shocked disbelief and said, "But that's not mate! I can take the queen!"

Finally, I must confess that I once played a positional move, back around 1982. I'll try not to let that happen again.

>> Click here to see Phony Benoni's game collections.

   Phony Benoni has kibitzed 18634 times to chessgames [more...]

   Jun-11-22 M Blau vs Keres, 1959

Phony Benoni: Not a good recommendation for the DERLD. Out of 59 moves, White makes only three in Black's half of the board. And two of those conist of 3.Bb5 and 6.Bxc6.

   Jun-11-22 chessgames.com chessforum

Phony Benoni: Er, it's back. Karpov vs Timman, 1988

   Jun-10-22 Orlo Milo Rolo

Phony Benoni: Marco!

   Jun-10-22 Lilienthal vs Bondarevsky, 1947

Phony Benoni: Another one for you King Hunters. Black's monarch travels fron g8 to b8, then takes the Great Circle Route back to h3 before calling it a day.

   Jun-10-22 GrahamClayton chessforum

Phony Benoni: <GrahamClayton> I've posted a question for you at L T Magee vs J Holland, 1948

   Jun-10-22 L T Magee vs E L Holland, 1948

Phony Benoni: <GrahamClayton> The source you cite, <Chess Review, May 1948, p. 24>, gives Black's name as <E Holland> "Chess Life" (June 5, 1948, p. 1) has a table of results giving <E L Holland>. That form also appears in USCF rating supplements for a player fro ...

   Jun-09-22 Biographer Bistro

Phony Benoni: SkinnVer Here Among the Fold?

   Jun-09-22 Flohr vs Bondarevsky, 1947

Phony Benoni: Black's bishop makes me think of Godzilla emerging from the depths of the ocean to wreak havoc. However, in the end it's his Two Little Friends who steal the show. Well, maybe not so litt.

   Jun-06-22 W Ritson-Morry vs G T Crown, 1947

Phony Benoni: it was the last round. Rison-Morry was mired in last place. These things happen.

   Jun-06-22 W Adams vs M Kagan, 1947

Phony Benoni: Some more informztion. The game was published in <Chess Review>, March 1948, p. 23. Black's name is given as "M Kagan", and the location as "Massachusetts". There is no other game data, but I think we can now safely assume Black is <Milton Kagan>. Earlier in the ...

indicates a reply to the comment.

Living in the Past

< Earlier Kibitzing · PAGE 719 OF 914 · Later Kibitzing>
Sep-24-15		Phony Benoni: Looks like the only clinch possible tonight is KC winning the AL Central with a win (currently behind 3-2 in the 4th) and a Minnesota loss (currently behind 6-0 in the 5th). Detroit, idle, is safe for tonight. Unfortunately, the weather is good for the weekend season at home.

Sep-24-15		WannaBe: Kershaw's 19Ks short of 300, last time a pitcher had 300Ks was 13 years ago. Two more starts for him, at SFG, then last game of the season (most likely meaningless game) vs SD. Think he'll throw a 27K perfecto at SFG and clinch the West for LAD?? =))

Sep-24-15		Phony Benoni: Oh, by the way. Oakland's loos to Texas means they are the first team to clinch their spot. They will finish last in the AL West.

Sep-24-15		WannaBe: Seattle/KC tied, Twinkies losing, big, to CLE. TOR have the head-to-head tie-break over KC (4-3 season series lead). Just in case they finish the season tied. SD 3, SF 2, but only top 4th, LAD's Magic Number can be 3 if SD wins.

Sep-24-15		Black Ops: Mr Phony, Cubs Win Cubs Win! Magic number 2! I think Giants are still playing...

Sep-25-15		Phony Benoni: <Black Ops>: I salute your enthusiasm, but did the Cubs even play today? Or are you getting ready for future victories?

Sep-25-15		Black Ops: Mr Benoni I must have seen a rerun score, or glimpsed into the future, or just maybe I made a brief stop in The Twilight Zone! ; P

Sep-25-15		Phony Benoni: Well, the Giants loss puts the Cubs' magic number at 1. Looks like they'll spend the last week fighting with Pittsburgh for the right to host to Wild Card Game; hard to see either catching St. Louis. Cardinals only need finish with 3-6 for 100 wins. The only other team with a chance to reach the mark is the Pirates, who need 7-2. On the other hand Phillies need 5-4 for 100 losses, Atlanta would have to go 0-9, and everyone else will avoid that disgrace. Besudes the Cubs, Toronto can clich a playoff spot with a win and losses by Minnesota and Angels, but they're not really concerned with that. Mets and Dodgers both at 3 to win their divisions. The White Sox have joined the Tigers on the edgel loss and Houston win eliminates them. Colorado is at (1) to clinch last place in the NL West.

Sep-25-15		WannaBe: LAD @ COL this weekend: Fri: Bolsinger (6-4) v Hale (4-5) Sat: Anderson (9-9) v Kendrick (6-13) Sun: Wood (11-11) v Rusin (5-9) On paper, Dodgers should clinch Sunday. With a little help from SFG, earliest would be Sat. SFG @ OAK Fri: Leake (10-9) v S. Gray (13-7) Sat: Hudson (8-8) v Zito (0-0) Sun: Heston (11-10) v Nolin (1-1)

Sep-25-15		WannaBe: Based upon highly respected & in-depth research done by one esteamed [sic] member on this super-duper knowledgeable site: Phony Benoni chessforum For the weekly $5.00 pool/donation. I've picked all the home teams in the 4 games where road team have to travel more than 2 time zones. Yes, I took Detroit over Denver.

Sep-25-15		WannaBe: Now we switch gear a bit and look at Saturday's NCAA foooootbol matchups: BYU @ Mich: Back to back road games for the Stormin' Mormons. After a close defeat at Ucla, will BYU (#22) survive a game at Ann Arbor? Central Mich @ Mich St (#2): Take the pay check, just take the money. Southern @ Georgia (#7): See above. UMass @ Notre Dame (#6): What, Coast Guard Academy wasn't available? Take the pay check UMass. Western Mich @ Ohio State (#1): The only question is how many QBs will Urban put on the field to see which one performs the best. Game be over by end of 1st Qtr. Univ. of Louisiana at Monroe @ Alabama (#12): Hey, it's a short road trip, be home by dinner. Ucla (#9) at Arizona (#16): ESPN GameDay will be there. Myles Jack of Ucla is out for the season. Hawai'i @ Wisconsin (#22): After visiting Columbus OH in week 2, the Warriors make another flight, to Madison Wisconsin. (Must have a lot of frequent flyer miles by now.)

Sep-25-15		WannaBe: Something happening at Kansas City...

Sep-25-15		WannaBe: KC's got a hit.

Sep-25-15		Phony Benoni: Atlanta 11, Miami 12, bottom 8th. I don't think there will be a save awarded in that game, just a survive. Penguin Time soon, and he will be chortling tonight. Mets magic number down to 1. Tigers stave off elimination yet again, and set off another wave of Northern Chortling.

Sep-25-15		Penguincw: Yes, I am chortling. :) Toronto won 5-3, New York lost 5-2. Tomorrow in Toronto, it'll be the battle of the 2 pitchers Blue Jays' hitters struggle with: Archer vs. Price. The magic number for division is down to 6 with 9 games to go. Simply going 4-5 will force NY to go 7-2 or better. Minnesota has already lost 6-4 thanks to <PB>'s team. Just waiting on the SEA-LAA game. Unfortunately, the Angels lead 4-3 in the 4th.

Sep-25-15		WannaBe: LAD lost, but SFG behind OAK 3-4 in the seventh.

Sep-26-15		Phony Benoni: Cubs Clinch! Cubs Clinch! Though it's not much fun when your game has been over for eight hours and, hopefully, you're fast asleep like a Good Little Cubbie. Angels' win means Toronto must wait another day to clinch a play-off spot. With Price pitching, I'm not betting against them. Mets (1) and Dodgers (2) can clinch their divisions on Saturday. Texas is actually closer to clinching their division than Toronto. They have been doing very well of late. Houston is only 1/2-game ahead of Angels, who are one game ahead of Twins. Then come Cleveland (3 games) and Baltimore (3.5), but it's getting pretty far-fetched after that. Besides Giants and Nationals, Boston and Detroit remain the only teams that can be eliminated tomorrow.

Sep-26-15		Black Ops: Hey Phony, I really am pleased with a winning season with The Cubbies even though a 1 game playoff decides their fate... Still they made great strides! P.S. On a much lesser note, I can't believe that The Chicago Bears have became the worst team in the NFL... : 0 I wish like almost every Bears fan that the damn McCaskey's would just sell the damn team already! They have humiliated The Monsters of the Midway into a disgrace!! With the great forsight of signing Jimmy Clausen as backup QB who is as useless as a random drunk pulled out of a Chicago bar & told your playing QB today! Playing Seattle on the road who are also 0-2 there is no end in sight to the misery ahead...

Sep-26-15		OhioChessFan: <With the great forsight of signing Jimmy Clausen as backup QB who is as useless as a random drunk pulled out of a Chicago bar & told your playing QB today!> Sounds like their starting QB too.

Sep-26-15		Penguincw: Toronto defeats Tampa Bay 10-8 today! Hard to imagine a slugfest among 2 pitchers both with a <3.33 ERA. Toronto actually clinched a postseason berth last night, as they haven't <mathematically> clinched a postseason spot, but they have <actually> clinched a postseason spot. http://m.mlb.com/news/article/15174... Here's an alternate way to explain it: Say there are 5 teams in a division, with the following records: 1) Team A 87-72 2) Team B 87-72 3) Team C 85-74 4) Team D 74-85 5) Team E 64-95 Each team has 3 games left, if my math is right. Let's just say that all the wild card spots are out of reach, and only the division winner here clinches. For a final, 3-game weekend series, Team C faces Team D, and Team A faces Team B. Team C's elimination number is at 2, so even though they aren't <mathematically> eliminated, in reality, they are eliminated, since either Team A or Team B will win finish with 89+ wins ('cause they're facing each other), going out of Team C's reach. Since Toronto clinches a postseason berth, the longest postseason drought now goes to Seattle, who hasn't appeared since 2001. Out of the 4 major sports leagues, the record now goes to the Buffalo Bills (1999). There's also Minnesota Timberwolves (2004) and Edmonton Oilers (2006). Toronto magic numbers: - To clinch the division: 5 - To clinch 1st seed: 10

Sep-26-15		WannaBe: Really good football game going on in Oakland, 49ers 14, Raiders 10. Too bad the 2 starting QBs got yanked early in the game. =))

Sep-26-15		WannaBe: What a finish in that TCU-TTU game!!

Sep-26-15		Jim Bartle: LIstening, I couldn't figure out the 4th-down TD. It was high, the receiver knocked it up in the air, and another guy caught it?

Sep-26-15		WannaBe: Yep, got the big toe in bounds and scored, review confirmed it. Then the hail mary, but flag on defense, then second hail mary, 4 laterals. Runner knocked out of bounds... Exciting stuff!!

Sep-26-15		WannaBe: After the opening drive by UA, Ucla's defence have definitely adjusted. 3 times have UA's snap gone awry, resulting in one turnover and Ucla TD. 21-7, Bruins, second quarter just begun. Dodgers losing 5-2 to Rockies.

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