TheAlchemist: Anyway, thanks <CC> for reminding me of my duties, I've been kind of slacking off lately.These quotes are a courtesy of <hitman84>. Thanks!
<aw1988, Jan-06-06, The Kibitzer's Café >:
<Benzol> Train A is traveling half the speed of 26...K-N5, on the track 1. P-K4. At the same time, Train B is traveling double the speed of 13. P-R6, on track 32. B-QN4. Assuming both trains are filled with stodgy English (living in Greece) columnists and Random Uzbekistans, when will the two trains collide?
<Benzol, Jan-06-06, The Kibitzer's Café >:
That sounds like calculating the compound interest on the angle of refraction traveling at the speed of light past three men who took four days to mow a lawn of six acres.
<Sneaky, Jan-09-06, Veselin Topalov >:
TOPACABANA
<Sung to the tune of Barry Manilow's "Copacabana">
His name was Vlesko, he was a showman ...
He would push his pawns right out, and make all the chess nerds shout
He'd play Benoni, and do the Najdorf
And while he tried to be a star
Kramnik watched on from afar
In that San Luis room, seven GM's met their doom
The sacs and pins were flying,
But just who pinned who?
<chorus>
It was Topa... Topacabana...
The hottest Champ since J.R. from Havana.
Oh yes it's Topa... Topacabaaana...
Pawn storms a-crashin' is always the fashion
With Topalov...
<Sneaky, Jan-10-06, Veselin Topalov >:
(By popular request here is verse #2 of my Barry Manilow mockery)
<TOPACABANA pt II>
His name was Kramnik, he was a world champ
But that was many years ago, back when Garry ran the show
Now it's a circus, a silly side show
It's become so cheap and seedy, run by all the crooks at FIDE
But Topa was renewed...
and that made Kramnik brood...
"I beat the Beast from Baku
But just WHO are YOU?"
He was Topa... Topacabana...
The hottest Champ since J.R. from Havana.
Oh yes it's Topa... Topacabaaana...
Pawn storms a-crashin' is always the fashion
Go Topalov...
<Endgame, Jan-10-06, Garry Kasparov >:
Garry Kasparov has always been able to find Waldo, except for one time. He found himself stumped on the last page of Where's Waldo Now?, not being able to find the Waldo without a shoe. He threw the book down and screamed, "This is BULL@#$%!" They're all wearing shoes." He then proceeded to eat the book and exclaim, "IF I CAN'T FIND WALDO, THEN NO ONE CAN!"
The book he ate belonged to a child that he had borrowed it from. The child began to cry and so Gazza ate him for good measure. The incident has since been refered to as Christmas.
Kibitzing
